Bill Cosby Quotes - Page 3

I once asked my father for a dollar for the school picnic. He told me how he once killed a grizzly bear with his loose-leaf notebook.

When a person has a gun, sometimes their mind clicks that this thing ... will win arguments and straighten people out.

Man can not live by bread alone ... he must have peanut butter.

I'm not the boss of my house. I don't know how I lost it, I don't know when I lost it, I don't really think I ever had it. But I've seen the boss's job...and I don't want it!

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.

Fathers are the geniuses of the house because only a person as intelligent as we could fake such stupidity.

My grandpa didn't believe in hugging and kissing, or saying I love you. His love had to do with the way he treated you. When he said, We're going here, we're going there, he was telling me about life. That was his love for me. My love for him was listening to what he said, keeping out of trouble, doing right, being fair.

The worst thing to do is to die while reading LIFE magazine.

There are some people who have trouble recognizing a mess.

When you introduce competition into the public school system, most studies show that schools start to do better when they are competing for students.

The essence of childhood, of course, is play.

Intellectuals are people who go to study things other people do naturally.

I can't even talk the way these people talk. 'Why you ain't?' 'Where you is?' Everybody knows it's important to speak English except these knuckleheads. You can't be a doctor with that kind of crap coming out of your mouth.

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.

There is no labor a person does that is undignified; if they do it right.

The most important educational vehicle in all life is a parent figure.

All parents experience the same problems.

The problem is that your daughter has given her heart to a 15-year-old boy, and a 15-year-old boy does not yet qualify as a human being.

We're not raising children with the love that we need to.

Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them.

You can teach an old dog new tricks. You just don't want to see the dog doing them.

In spite of what Thomas Jefferson wrote, all men may be created equal, but not to all women.

The heart of marriage is memories.

Even though your kids will consistently do the exact opposite of what you're telling them to do, you have to keep loving them just as much.

Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers.